Me: At this age, I’m already over the hill.
Mom: Really? But you’re so young.
Me: Yes. I’m in my most fertile years. I should already be having kids by now.
Alex: Twenty is about the right age.
Mom: So human fertility doesn’t look like t-distribution.
Dad: No. It’s more like chi-squared.
Mom: Alex wants to go to graduate school for neuropsychology but he doesn’t know where to apply yet.
Me: Once he figures out what about neuro that he likes, it’ll be easier to narrow down the choices. Cognitive, ev-bio, comparative ..
Mom: I’ve noticed that you two have very similar interests.
Me: We are your kids.
Dad: That’s right! [...]
Dad: So is it “get out of my face” or “get off my face”?
Me: It’s “get out of my face”. “Get off my face” means something very different.
Dad: Wow. That’s so confusing. It’s an American thing, right?
Me: Yes, Dad. Totally is.
Mom: Ai-yah. Ba, you don’t need to give Amber money for the trip. She has income now!
Me: But it all goes to gas. Every other week, I go to the gas station and feed it my paycheck. “Yummy, yummy! Guess what Amber has for you! Fifty dollars!”
Byrnes sent flowers last Friday, after a very teary talk, but I haven’t been able to enjoy them until today because I was either at work or in Boston. While I was gone, my father had been tending the flowers for me. I have great men in my life.
